New Mom Need Coffee

Have I talked about sleep on here before? I can't seem to remember. Sleep used to be a subject I didn't care much about. Pre-kids I didn't care much, I knew I needed a certain amount of sleep to function but otherwise I was always the type to pop out of bed in the morning and didn't waste anytime laying around in it. Oh how life changes when you have kids. My second born is a great sleeper. In fact he is asleep right now, my oldest on the other hand is wide awake and happy about it. He has never been a good sleeper, it has been a struggle his entire existence. Sleep is now ALWAYS on my mind and I am always trying to find a way to make my toddler sleep better. Put him on a schedule, give him a bath before bed, make sure all the lights are out, don't dress him in heavy pajamas, keep the room cool, make sure there is background noise, and most of all make sure we have one or two pacifiers handy. It consumes my mind. I don't think he will ever be a good sleepe...

There's a lot of pressure to start traditions and to have your home decorated in Christmas décor and to be excited about Christmas. Here I am 5 days away and I'm that person that just really isn't into the hype. I'm not a super materialistic person, nor do I buy into getting your children everything they ever dreamed of. My kids are small so maybe I will be more into Christmas when they're old enough but right now I feel like a scrooge. I didn't have Christmas traditions growing up and I remember waking up early to open gifts from "santa" and it was fun but Christmas time was not a great memorable time for me. I want it to be a great time for my boys and something to look forward to but I'm debating even telling my kids about Santa Clause. All I can think is they will know I lied to them when they find out there isn't a Santa clause. I can't remember when I found out there wasn't a santa, I had older cousins who must have broke it to...

Let's get serious, I'm starting right now. I know everyone gets on the nutrition exercise bandwagon come January, but I am starting right now. It is time to get serious. For too long my toddler has been fed junk just to get through the day. He has been given whatever food he wants, even candy and sugary drinks. For a long time I have given myself permission to eat whatever I wanted because I was pregnant or a tired mom. Those are not excuses. I am young, I have the knowledge and I want to live the best life I can live and have no limitations. My hobby is exercise and nutrition, I used to push myself whenever I could, experiment on what made me more fit and what made me more healthy and feel better. I have some tricks up my sleeve, I know my body and I know what works for me. So why don't I do it? I have been very very LAZY. To me, that is exactly what eating unhealthy is, laziness or lack of knowledge (or lack of motivation to get the knowledge) to eat healthy and live ...

I live in a small town. I live in a very small town. Finding things to entertain you without driving an hour can be challenging. I also have 2 kids under 2 and the winter is approaching. That means we will most likely be stuck in the house for days at a time. I now stay at home with my kids 4 days a week and work 3. What is a person to do with 2 kids under 2 all winter in a tiny house? That is what I'm creatively trying to answer right now. My 18 month old and 5 month old don't quite entertain one another yet so that is up to me. (Oh I look forward to the day they play together) My 18 month old is getting dangerously close to being a "Video" addict. I want to avoid this at all costs. He will walk up to me and say "video" and that lets me know he's ready to watch a movie on the tv or something on his ipad. This I never wanted when I thought about having kids but I've also learned since having kids, you do what you can to survive, so there's no j...

When I was pregnant with Tucker I wanted to experience everything naturally. I wanted a natural birth, no medication and I wanted to breastfeed because it is natural. If you know me I would stick to 100% natural and be a hippie if I had that kind of will power. Being a hippie is hard work, so I digress. Anyhow I had a wonderful pregnancy, had eaten healthy and STILL got gestational diabetes (I know now it was out of my control, I tried so hard to keep my glucose levels in check so I wouldn't have to put unnatural medication in my body, afraid it would effect the baby, because you just don't know. (how I felt before mind you) So I bopped around all glowy and pregnant telling everyone I was going to do it the natural way. I got a lot of comments that were unwelcome, I mean A LOT of comments saying I would feel differently when I went into labor. I think I let those comments get into my head, because what did I do when I got to the hospital? I immediately requested an epidural....

Lately the husband and I have been talking about moving away, whether it be a few towns over that would be closer to his future job or it be a bigger town states away. It's this huge life changing decision that I don't like to make. Our little ones are so close to their grandparents and cousins, and we would absolutely hate to take them away but at the same time we both have this gut feeling of wanting more and wanting to experience more. Its almost like I'm torn between what's an easy decision and what is hard but could be the best thing for us. I'm not saying where we live now doesn't off "enough" it's just that we want more. It would be easy to take a piece of land given to us and build a house and live in the comfort of seeing our family almost everyday. It would be hard to choose exactly where to live and it would be hard to start over in a new place, living like we've never lived before. How do you decide. Obviously we would need to...

I have been seeing the positive lately in just about everything. This time of life with two littles under 2 can be both exhausting and the most enriching. I love to watch my two boys learn and grow, I think this time around with my 3 month old I am hyper aware of how fast he is growing and learning. I didn't have much to compare with my oldest and now that I do it's absolutely incredible how my little Grant is growing by leaps and bounds. He is already rolling on his side! Tucker is developing a stronger personality everyday! He is a full blow toddler with his own attitude and flair. He can repeat almost anything, and he definitely chooses his words wisely, he only repeats what he wants and ignores everything else. He is strong willed and knows exactly what he wants. That is refreshing yet challenging. Sometimes he will try to communicate what he wants and I don't quite understand which frustrates him, but I can see the comedy in it because one day he won't be dep...

Challenges make me stronger. I learn from what has challenged me. I think everyone does, whether they know it or not. That's the thing about having kids, almost everyday is a challenge when they're little, anything can happen. You can wake up thinking today will be a good day, both kids slept good or both kids are in a great mood, and in the blink of an eye things can get very challenging. You can drive 45 blissful minutes in a car where both kids have behaved great, and get to the pumpkin batch and it goes to poo. Both kids are crying, one because he only napped 15 minutes and the other has you so confused you're panicking a little. But because you drove 45 minutes to get there you keep going, keeping getting them bundled up (which they hate) and you continue to put your crying baby in his baby carrier because all of the other times he loved it and you continue to put a crabby toddler in the stroller who will not wear his hood in the freezing wind. Challenges will ...

I've heard a lot of people say lately that Fall is their favorite time of year. I am no different, I look forward to fall like I look forward to a long hot shower. The summer drains me, especially when pregnant and especially with a new baby. I like the cook crisp air of fall and I like the leaves when they crunch, I like all of the cliché things too such as boots, sweaters, and the good ol' pumpkin spice latte. (which I have recently tried to recreate at home and have failed miserably) Something I would like to start doing this fall on the blog is reviews. I am currently in the market for a nespresso and when I do get it I would like to review it here on the blog. I am a huge coffee/espresso lover and any time I find something that changes the game I'm going to share it. I would also like to do baby/toddler reviews, I just signed up to receive Highlights, the childrens magazine that I used to read when I was little. Well they have a new baby/toddler version where the pag...

Do not go to sleep with wet hair. Because when Tucker needs your hair for comfort at 3:30 am and it's wet he will stay up and cry. NEVER GO TO SLEEP WITH YOUR HAIR WET. That is all. -B

Time. Time is flying by and life is getting so busy that I can't even think straight. I spend most of my time thinking of twenty five things at once and that is not a joke. While I'm doing one thing I'm always thinking a step ahead and thinking 99% of the time about my boys. That includes my husband. Anyhow that relates to how fast time is flying because when I wake up in the morning (yesterday at 6 am) and I have thought an hour has passed when really it's lunch time already. There is always always something to do and not enough time to do it. (I won't bring up my lack of printing pictures, I still don't have a single picture of Grant printed out) Therefore time is flying by at a rate that reminds me I need to document these times. There are so many things I want to remember while the boys are little. For instance how Tucker will rub Grants head when he walks by him, or how Tucker goes to the pantry and picks out what he wants to eat when he's hungry....

I find it hard to put into words everything that's going through my mind at 37 weeks and 6 days pregnant. I know that toward the end of most women's pregnancies they nest and clean and take care of house to prepare for baby, although I feel like I'm doing that, I also feel like I'm freaking out a little. As you know I have a 1 year old at home and now I'm freaking out about schedules. First let me say, I don't spend a lot of time at home, especially not as much time as I want. We are always visiting family or going out. In my ideal world I would be home more and cook more homemade meals. To me the key to eating healthy is cooking at home. So anyhow I have been freaking out about schedules because I fully believe in scheduling my time and I would LOVE to schedule my sons time, such as naps. BUT since we're not home (I work 4 days a week) as much that's pretty much impossible. So I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to stay sane with 2 littl...

What do you envision for your family in the future? That's what I've been asking myself lately, and my husband. It's a hard question but it's good to think about it and plan for it now when you still have control and time to think about it. I have all of these dreams for my family, and visions of what I believe our future will look like. I worry that maybe my husband doesn't share that same vision. I have tried to get it out of him, as to what he wants in the future but I don't think he's put a lot of thought into it so I plan to revisit it, until then here is what I want the future to look like for my family. I want to be active with my family and hike, bike, play sports and always have something to do after school or even throughout the day so that we're not always thinking of our next meal. I want to EAT TO LIVE NOT LIVE TO EAT. I feel as though currently I live to eat, always thinking about my next meal/snack and always thinking about healthy v...

Lately there has been things to happen to our family that can make life not so much difficult as uncomfortable. Since we've been married we have not had to worry about keeping a budget and sticking to it. We are truly blessed. But things have happened lately (one being having a baby) that have hit us hard financially. It has made things a bit uncomfortable. We are now trying to budget and get back on track but it's been difficult. We're working on it, it's a process. But obviously when there is a strain on your wallet there is a strain on your relationships and for myself a strain on my mood. Being pregnant can make your hormones go bonkers but add the stress of planning a 1st birthday party (which takes a lot of money), getting bill after bill in the mail and trying to adjust to a new lifestyle of budgeting and realizing your dream of building a house has been delayed AGAIN can make you even more hormonal. I have no been very pleasant to be around lately. I wou...

I listen to podcasts quite often, I should actually do a whole blog post on my top 10 because I love them so thoroughly! Anyways I listen to podcasts quite often and I have recently been listening to a podcast called Mystery Show. I won't get into exactly what the show is except you should know by the name the narrator and producer solves mysteries. So she was trying to find a way to talk to Britney Spears so she purchases tickets from ticketmaster and when she calls ticketmaster to try and find out how the meet and greet with Britney will go she has a long conversation with the representative about life. He said something that struck a cord with me, in their random conversation (who knew you could have such a lovely conversation with a representative when you ask questions?) he says "If more people worried about other people and asked questions, there would be less time to be selfish and more time to talk to others and learn about other people, cause that's what life i...

I can use the plural version of kids because I am now 32 weeks and feel as though our baby #2 will be here soon!!! Anyways todays post is about feeding Tucker and our new one. First lets acknowledge that Tucker did not breastfeed, he never latched so I pumped and it was really hard so Tucker got 2 weeks of breast milk and then was switched to formula. I'm not judging anyone using formula but I always always wanted my son to have the most natural nutrition, breast milk. Since that did not work out, I'm a little pessimistic about baby #2 breastfeeding. I wish I didn't feel this way but I almost believe it won't happen. I will try my best and try to breast feed but I'm scared the cycle will repeat itself. Hopefully in a month or 2 I will find out my worries are all for nothing. My current struggle is feeding Tucker. I've been pretty LAZY about feeding him healthy food. Lets face it I am pregnant and although I never can say I've really had "cravings...

Last night 95/29/15) Josh and I went out with friends. Tucker spent the night with Josh's family and although going out with a group of friends brings me anxiety, leaving my child overnight brings even more anxiety. I had spent the whole day with Tucker but I feel like I have attachment issues because, let me tell you, it wasn't easy leaving him to go hang out with friends. I miss that kid even when I'm away for an hour or two. But alas we left and met up with some friends for dinner and dessert out in Lexington. When I say that a night out with friends brings me anxiety I mean that in a way that I have no clue how to act therefore I freeze up and am awkwardly silent. Sometimes I eventually come out of my shell but the need to come up with something intelligent or witty cripples me and I ultimately sit there in awkward silence. Last night went a bit better, mostly because my husband was the one sitting there in awkward silence and all I could think was "we can...

I have reached the nesting phase. But I'm so busy and so tired I feel like there isn't much I can do! Frustrating feeling that's for sure, and I'm not the type to let something go so.... I am currently brainstorming how to downsize my small little "bungalow-like" home. We had originally thought we would have been moved out by now but things have changed and we will be in this tiny house at least for another year. So how to deal? I am going to start small, I'm very excited for my sister to come over Tuesday to help me clean but I'm such a control freak I'm afraid I'm going to scare her off. lol So hopefully I will document the downsize, and by downsize I mean I would like to minimalize somewhat. We'll see. -B

As I sit here watching the sunrise out the window I think about how my little boy is going to be one year old soon. Things have changed so much in a year. Life has gotten so much more joyful and so much more complicated. I am currently 30 weeks pregnant with my second little boy and all I can think is I need to hold Tucker as much as I can. I'm sure I'm having every thought that goes through a moms mind when she has a second baby so close to the first. This is too soon, I need more time with my first. I'm scared to add another little rambunctious one to the mix. Will they get along? Will they fight more than they get along? What will life be like? So today I'm going to remember the sweet moments I have with Tucker, like putting him to sleep at night. I don't do this often, Josh has gotten into the routine since I have a growing belly which makes it difficult when Tucker is in a wiggle mood. But a few nights ago I put him to sleep, he feel asleep in my arms. I s...

I have become a creature of habit, change it hard for me. When I was younger it was no big deal, from childhood we moved a lot and my life was always changing, but after being married and I got settled I don't want anything to change. It was hard after having a baby, I anticipated that things would change, and change quite often, but to add another to our family. That is another big change. I am so excited and anxious to meet baby #2, but things are moving quite fast. Tucker will be 1 next month and then the following month I will have our second son. Another big change coming to the family is my husbands job. He is waiting, waiting, waiting on the phone call for a start date to his new job/career. It is exciting and he is excited but me I'm in the background thinking EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE!!! Right now we have a good routine watching Tucker. I take care of him Monday through Thursday, Josh and I both work on Fridays so his mom watches him and Josh takes care of him Satur...

On the subject of taking parenting advice from others: I do not recommend it. Yes a lot of parents when they hear you are a first time parent will give you tons of unsolicited advice, and while you may be like a sponge (much like me) and take it all in and try your hardest to remember it when the time comes, it can sometimes hurt you. A lot of parents think after raising their kids and they turned out pretty good that they have it all figured out. Think again, each kid is different, and I can certainly say that for our little one. When we first had Tucker everyone told us, DO NOT PUT HIM IN THE BED WITH YOU HE WILL BE THERE UNTIL HE IS 10. Something we never wanted to do was have our child sleep with us until he was 10. So we adamantly kept him in his crib, through allllll of the sleepless nights. We put him in the bed with us a week and a half ago. Viola the kid sleeps through the night and the parents get sleep. See SEE what I mean. Tucker just needed the comfort of his parents, cou...

My confession: I watch youtube religiously. I love watching families film their lives (especially the families that are from other countries) and I love to watch beauty gurus put makeup on even though I don't wear that much makeup. I keep up with a few families who put up videos everyday and almost watch them every single day. I am addicted. Anyhow there is a downside, I don't know if anyone else does this, but I am ridiculously bad at comparing myself to others. I hate it but I do it anyway and in a way it motivates me but in a lot of bad ways it gets me down. So I was on youtube this morning watching a vlog my husband referred to me and he was having a bad day but made a very encouraging positive comment I wanted to share because I want to try to remember it everyday! "we all have problems the best thing we can do is solve one problem at a time, slap a smile on our face and do not worry, because worrying does not change the outcome, keep moving forward, smile and tak...

I totally forgot to take pictures of everything I ate yesterday, it's such a shame too because I had some good food with reasonable portions. Boo I'm going to start taking pictures right this moment, I'm having a homemade starbucks mocha at the moment. Hope you're having a good morning! -B

I have been trying to figure out what in the world I could do to get motivated to eat better this pregnancy. I was so much better at eating healthy with Tucker, it wasn't even hard, I craved fruit and loved all the healthy food. This time around is completely different, and I don't know if it's because I am more stressed (which means for me that I will eat my feelings...bad, bad, bad) and that makes me want to indulge more, but basically there has been no healthy eating over here. I haven't even given myself boundaries when it comes to the amount of sweets I eat. I think it's good to have a plan in motion everyday, for instance my plan for the last 5 months seems to be "DRINK MORE WATER" I do not like water lately, I used to drink it religiously but tend to want soda, pepsi in particular, I've somehow got it in my head that I need the caffeine. If you are not normally a soda drinker and then start drinking it (like me) you know you don't get an...

I listen to a lot of music, a wide variety, and there is typically a reason I listen to a certain song, today I'm listening to Mat Kearney's new album called Just Kids. Mat Kearney is my all time favorite artist, his music has always had a good message for me. His words have meaning. I love the beats in his music, and I love the laid back sound. Today while listening "Los Angeles" which sounds like a song about how he started in the music industry, I started to think about how I feel like I'm meant for a more. What do you do when you know you're meant for more but aren't quite sure what that more is and how to know? I want to be more brave to do more with my life. There's a lot of times that I feel a bit caught in between a space I can't get out of. For instance I'm still in school.....10 years out of high school and STILL in school, and before I always had the mentality that my life will start when I finish school and can have a career that me...

I am probably the most tired I have ever been in my life, but that's okay because I am currently growing a baby in my belly and running after a really fast 8 month old. Life is good. Exhausting in the best way. Tucker is at the stage where everything is fun and happy. He makes me smile more often then ever. Although one of the reasons I am so tired is because he still does not sleep through the night (perhaps its worse than ever now) but if that's his only problem, I'm not going to complain. This winter has been crazy, Tucker and I have been pretty restless cooped up in the house, I cannot wait until warm weather and we can go to the park more! I think that might be good for his sleeping habits too! Anyways just a quick update, sometimes I don't know what to write about, my brain capacity is so full these days with baby, baby, baby that I can't think straight, so I will write when I have something on my mind. :)

Will I be strong enough to be the parent I need to be? I have always wanted to do the right things by my son; I want to be the one to make the strong decisions not the easy ones. I want to do what will eventually make my son a strong, honorable, honest, and good person. He is seven months old and I feel like I have already failed him. I sit and think about how what he is learning now will shape his future. That baby is smart. He knows how to work me already. (Disclaimer: I am a very tired mom, have a full plate with working full time, taking college classes and still watching Tucker 4 days a week, and keeping the house in order, oh yea and trying to have a social life) He knows how to get what he wants. Just yesterday I was feeding him his oatmeal and he took the spoon from my hand and when I tried to take it back he squealed and bucked backwards in his highchair. Of course I gave the spoon back to him, I was tired and just wanted him to eat his oatmeal and not fuss. That, that mome...

Tucker is now 7 months old. Tucker has never been a good sleeper. So now we are trying sleep training, and you have no idea how much I dread it. We have an article we are using that has all the instructions for the specific sleep training we will be doing ( I will reference it below) I watched a youtube video (which I will link below as well) of a mother who tried this method and it seems to be working for her, and we are going to give it a try. I wanted to document this because I wanted to be able to look back when Tucker is sleeping through the night, and know we did the right thing. You may be wondering what sleep training is, it can also be called the cry it out method, but ours will be a little different. Tucker could wake from his nap at any time so I better run, but I will be on here tomorrow hopefully with an update on how tonight goes. *cross your fingers for me!* Sleep training article: http://sleepcenter.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=60 Youtube video we watched: https://www....

Wow Will I really be 12 weeks pregnant on Monday? Yes. I know time is going to fly with this pregnancy because I have my hands full! Tucker is in this new adorable always smiling and KEEPING ME BUSY stage. He loves to hold on to my fingers and have me walk him around. I mean when he whines I'm pretty sure that's all he wants. Although it really hurts my back to bend over and walk around like that, I do it and will always do it because it makes him happy :) Life is already changing now that Tucker is a little more independent and more mobile. He doesn't crawl yet, but he can scoot himself on his belly 360 degrees and grab toys, he is getting better at playing by himself so that gives me a little more time to do laundry and pick up the house a little better. We have started to put him in his high chair while we eat supper at the table and let him try some of the food we're eating, most of the time he enjoys it. Sometimes with his short attention span he hates to be in h...