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Today my boy is three months old. THREE MONTHS OLD. It's taken me three months to start a blog and put my feelings of motherhood on the web. I always knew I would start a mommy blog. I always wanted to document every little thing happenining in my families life. Granted there isn't much going on in our simple life but I wanted to have something to look back on, like a memory book. Also let me say I am NOT a writer, English is my absolute worst subject, and spelling, forget it, thank goodness for spellcheck! So I hope that can be overlooked and anyone who reads this will just find some relateable material aka stories and maybe some funny antidotes. First let me start with my son Tuckers 3 month update. I don't honestly know where to start because since his birth up until now there have been so so many changes! It would almost be impossible to list them all, especially for this scatter brained mom, but I can try. Since bringing Tucker home 3 months ago this boy has changed so much! Take a look:
(From Top to Bottom) 1 month, 2 months, 3 months *it would not let me add his newborn picture...I'll post one another day. I don't want to list all the details for every month but when he was born (40 weeks & 1 day gestation) he weighed 8lbs 1 oz was 20inches long. I can now 3 months later tell you he weighs 14 lbs and is almost 25 inches long. This is my first child and i did not know they grew so fast, i wouldn't have believed anyone if they had told me. I did not know I could love another so much. I want to be with him all the time, even when he's crying his eyes out. I'm not going to lie this has been the hardest and most rewarding 3 months of my life. It has made my marriage stronger, and my life so full and happy, but it has been so so hard. No one could have ever told me about the slept deprivation either, boy oh boy, eventually you learn to be a zombie and accept it. But also I never feel like what I am doing is the right thing, besides loving him to pieces. As a parent you make so many decisions in one single day and as for me, I never feel like it's the right decision. I am constantly second guessing myself and feeling like everything is overwhelming, in a good way. ALL of the problems we do have are good problems thus far. It's a good problem if Tucker will not sleep because WE HAVE A LITTLE BABY BOY and if he needs his mom to hold him all night long, that's what he gets because WE are Blessed enough to be able to Have our Little Boy and he is healthy. :) This little boy has completely stole my heart in a way I never thought possible, so everything that I feel is different in my life (better or more difficult) has made me more happy and scared then i have ever been before. I understand my point started out being an update/introduction but to be clear I never claimed to be a "writer" and I will go ahead and warn you why: because I can not form collective thoughts when writing, they are simply random. Hope that's okay for now. Maybe my skills will develope in the future. So here it is, I hope I can write often but until the next time. Enjoy. -B

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